gearing Up (it's december?!)

       Today, I want to share a little look into my last week or so (disclaimer: it was not so nice, but it's gotten better!) and a bit of what's to come.

      I've not been feeling well at all.  Since I got back from my trip home for Thanksgiving, I've had a nasty cold and have spent most of my time at home in the evenings and over the weekend knocked out in a nyquil induced coma. Super lame timing, because I've got classes to keep up with leading up to finals and I missed a couple of quizzes :(

       I'm a good student, normally the type that over studies for everything, and doesn't skip class unless absolutely necessary. Even though at this point in the semester it didn't hurt my overall grades, I was pretty disappointed with myself for slacking.

          Thankfully, I'm starting to feel a lot better and have really jumped back in with both feet this week! I'm also the kind of student who always makes connections with my teachers, which has proved to be SO helpful! I've got notes for everything I missed and have very graciously been allowed to make up my missed assignments with no penalty, which I totally don't deserve, and I couldn't be more thankful!

        During my bout of sickness I fell into a nasty little habit of feeling sorry for myself. While my body needed the rest and hours of lying in bed in the dark, my heart really did not.  Depression and sickness do not mix, it was super hard to get up in the morning and when I got home from work, I was literally ready to crawl back into bed.  I know that's awful and I felt like I was living under a dark cloud.

         I also found that it's incredibly easy to be angry right now because; two weeks from now is what would have been our 2 year anniversary, and further realization of what I don't have anymore-i.e. a husband who takes care of me when I'm sick(this was made abundantly clear to me when I had food poisoning a couple of weeks ago and missed work).

          As I've mentioned before, I'm really not a homebody, and can only take so much of this invalid business, even when I feel awful.  So, I've kicked my butt into gear and have been making myself do yoga and pilates at home even though I haven't felt like it, listening to music that's uplifting/instrumental instead of most of the songs I've posted on here that cause me to dwell that much more on XH, the divorce, etc.  Exercise, prayer/scripture, my playful little kitten and lots of vitamin c have all helped to lift my spirits and I'm doing much better now :)

       I'm happy to report that I'm no longer the newest member of the Lawrence team at Meritrust. Today, I started helping with the training of two new hires! 
On one hand, I can't believe I'm allowed to teach anyone how to do anything when I've only been there 6 months. But on the other, I do know quite a lot for the short amount of time I've been there and I'm kind of like "Finally! I have some validation that I'm a useful, valued member of this team!".  Things are gearing up for the big relocation of the downtown branch, Ashley is going to have her baby any day now, and everyone is buzzing around working on processing all the holiday "skip a payment" applications. I'm acting as the sort of 'on call' person, hopping to both branches as needed. I like it, it breaks up the monotony that a "nine to five" type job can sometimes be.

           All in all, I'm doing well. I'm excited to get this semester behind me and I'll welcome each change and new development that comes my way.

^"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end,

they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness."

Lamentations 3:22-23

-Hannah

P.S. I'm feeling pretty empowered because when my shower head broke the other day I got a new one and installed it all by myself with my new tools :D